Fenris in Kirkwall [source: Dragon Age]
Some Hawkes were better than others. I was given back to Danarius a few times, and escaped again often. Other times, I would stay, and be treated like dirt. The times when I was happy with Hawke were some of the best, whether his friends could tolerate me or not, but it was certainly better when we all got along alright. If not, I always had Varric.
I remember more Garretts than Marians, more mages than warriors, and more warriors than rogues.
Sometimes I was closer to the other Hawkes than the Champion. I was very much so in love with Bethany once, having gotten closer in the Deep Roads. Her dying saying it was better than the Circle struck me hard. I couldn’t believe all mages were dangerous when she was so kind, and Anders used that to slowly convince me that the Circle was wrong. In the end, we marched to the Chantry together, and demanded everyone either swear before the Maker to help the mages or die. Fighting ensued, none who ran for help made it out, and then we blew it up, running just ahead of the flames to Hawke. He was extremely disappointed in us. We became pirates with Isabella.
I was with Carver a few times, reassuring him at night that I didn’t think he was less than the Champion, and during the day telling said Champion their little brother didn’t want them dead. I related strongly to his feelings of just feeling like an extension to someone. Our apparent loyalty to the Templars saved a mage Hawke and his friends on at least one occasion.
I remember wiggling into Donnic and Aveline’s relationship, once by bonding with Donnic over Wicked Grace before they got together, and once after they were married.
I was a girl, just once.
At one point, Anders persuaded Hawke to give me back to slavers when they appeared on the Wounded Coast, due to the fact my mistrust of mages was "an inconvenience" with their grand plan to liberate all mages. This time hurt more than any other time I was given back. It did thankfully not last, as Varric freed me again.
I did not always kill my sister, or go after her when she lived. When I did try to find her again, to apologize, sometimes she would forgive me; she has little else, after all. She would live with me in our stolen mansion, in Hawke’s mansion if I was with them, or, in some cases, in a Hanged Man suite Varric paid for. Variana and I once had a relationship with Orana at the same time, but more frequently I would help them get together.
I was always protective of Orana, whether I dated her or not. Oftentimes, I considered her a better sister than Variana. When we were together romantically, though, I snuck into Hawke’s mansion to see her. Merrill and I sometimes met at the windowsills as we were coming and going through the night, promising each other not to tell the Champion that we’d seen each other. She liked watering their plants and playing with the mabari. It was our best kept secret, and often something simple that established trust, despite our differences.
Often I would realize I could touch Varric and play with his hand, having been deprived of any sort of physical intimacy for years. Usually it stayed just that, other times I’d be very much in love. It wasn’t rare that we’d both be in love with Hawke, and then simply settle for each other. This often led to me following him to the Inquisition, whether he paid me, we were friends, or I was too smitten to let him out of my line of sight.
I often helped Varric sneak around to see Bianca--the dwarf, not the crossbow--as he needed a lookout and occasionally a bodyguard. It didn’t matter whether we were together or not. It was something I accepted: she loved both him and her husband [usually, anyway], and Varric loved both her and me. The only difficult part was throwing Varric over walls. For a rogue, an outdoorsman he was not.
Continue to my time as a pirate,
Continue to the time I was a woman in Kirkwall, or
Continue to life after Kirkwall.
Return to Start.