Gilbert Beilschmidt       [source: Hetalia]

Where I’m from, Mattias was regarded by other nations every bit as Germanic as he was Nordic, though within the Germanics, he was a bit of an outsider. When I say “Germanics” here and refer to my family, he is included.

I hated humans, adopting Germania’s view on them being useless and disgraceful for pitting us against each other for material things such as wealth and power, as he saw us as something divine, to be used for divine purposes. Germania also insisted that I distrust my family, and that I worship the old Norse gods. I never fully converted, seeing my gods as Saints, and the Crusades felt wrong to me, as I was fighting those that in my eyes were fooling themselves about their gods’ importance, despite believing wars of religion were inherently superior. Later on in life, I would regret my involvement immensely.

Amongst his many flaws, Germania isolated each of the Germanic States to varying extents, and we were each told vastly different things about how we were related [such hardly mattered, being that we sprang from the earth, but no matter]. One particular instance, when Roderich and I were very young and Germania was dying, I remember thinking, “Oh, my brother, Roderich,” as he thought, “Is that my uncle, Gilbert?” only for Germania to introduce us to each other as cousins. I certainly gained my organization from the army, not inheritance. However, I do not know if I took my obedience to the army from essentially being born to deal with it, or from Germania.

After Holy Rome “died” [as I fully believed he did], there were struggles amongst myself and my family. I rose to the top, having had more experience with fighting, and became known as Prussia. I was still the equivalent of a teenager, and among those who didn’t fade [and most did, to varying events], was Ludwig.

I protected him, sheltered him, and have him my share of food more often than not when some leaders dismissed us. I was later told that that had probably stunted my growth, not that I minded being shorter than most, as long as fashions allowed for my boots to show I was an inch taller than Roderich and the same height as Elizabeta. I was actually rather proud of him for looking far more menacing than I, but it was more than appearance for him.

I suppressed my emotions near constantly, portraying myself as brutal, efficient, and confident. I thought of myself as a warrior, first and foremost, as an army personified more than a nation. Ludwig, as a result, tried to mimic me, though he was far too insecure and confused to understand what was happening [though Roderich did his best to explain in what felt like a custody battle over him]. As he never truly saw my emotions towards anyone other than Old Fritz [a dear friend, no more], he never learned to interact with others, and Germania’s ancient lessons of us being better than humans being passed down limited any learning he could have done from them.

I was in the colonies for the Revolutionary War as a young man, mostly because I was interested. I saw Alfred primarily as another little brother, though thankfully he wasn’t terribly affected by me.

At one point, Francis, Tonio, Alfred, Mattias and I went into the Paris catacombs, and got lost, for at least a few days. It was miserable. We all cried at least once.

After the first world war, I found myself growing closer to Roderich. What had been quickly written off as getting along for the sake of politics and perhaps union soon became friendship, and, with Roderich unable to walk some days, an intense desire to protect him. There was a period of calm where I spent a lot of time with him and Elizabeta before the Wall Street Crash, and he was back to chronic pains so terrible he couldn’t walk at all. Elizabeta and I hardly left his side.

With the second world war building itself up, Roderich began to use a cane to get out and see what was happening, and decided to share something with the Germanics--he had converted to Judaism centuries ago, and was not planning on conveniently forgetting this. I felt as though I was responsible for finding a way to save thousands, though knowing him personally made it difficult to think clearly, what with all my worrying.

I constantly urged him to do more so that he wouldn’t die as so many of our family did when Germany was first unified. I remember at one point I was begging him to run, but he calmly refused, not wanting to leave behind those who thought he was simply their human friend. He was far stronger than the rest of us, resisting the slow drain of energy and constant nagging feeling of dread that denying our governments gave us, though I never realized then the toll his own act of confidence was taking on him.

I replaced the cross Antonio had given him when they were married, and made sure he wore it. Ludwig mostly kept others from noticing details about him, and frankly anyone he could destroy paperwork about. Mattias did all he could to help directly, protecting Roderich personally [with Elizabeta] before assisting resistance in his own home [alongside Berwald, of course] to save the lives of thousands and their families. Vash, meanwhile, did not seem to care for anyone but the people–and gods bless him for that determination, it was certainly doing far more than my panicking.

Being something born to fight, being incapable of dying from mere human attacks, and being panicked on several different levels for everyone from my brother to those humans I had seen as less than myself, I tried what I hadn’t in centuries–to fight my own leaders. Where I came from, this led to a far more sudden and intense drain of energy, so that the nation rebelling would be pacified almost instantly, and far more likely to give into the quiet urges to follow along with what the government wanted. Other nations considered it mere proof of the people’s feelings, and would “try” as a protest, to wake up a few hours later, ready to rejoin a more peaceful fight.

I, however, being an idiot and definitely really trying to kill people, passed out for three days.

Ludwig decided to take over all the paperwork, meetings, and time spent running after Feliciano [who, looking back, seemed to be doing his best to waste government time, money, and other resources, though I have no idea how he would have been able to consciously do so for years so directly without that supply of energy falling flat], as he was best suited to do [I found both Italians weak--I preferred Lovino for having spine enough to back talk, but didn’t have the patience for either of them], leaving me to do what I could.

With sharing information also impossible, it was mostly distributing what was needed to those who were trying to resist, mostly with Mattias guiding me through that [as this was something that I had never done before, having always been fundamentally obedient to whoever commanded the army at the time].

Eventually, it ended, and the training I had given Alfred paid off. There were a few weeks where the nations involved were together, in a state of shock and mourning we had been holding off for years. I think the first time Ludwig cried since he was a child was when helping survivors, and taking names of those what little we could do wasn’t enough for. It was almost comforting to be all together, until the Allies began to discuss who would take what.

I don’t remember exactly when, but long before the wall went up, I found myself in a dark room, subjected to occasional beatings from Ivan for an unknown period of time [I was vaguely aware of space exploration and talk of others disliking him]. Natalya sometimes either joined, watched, or took his place. I was far too weak to fight back, and though largely unaware of how under Soviet command I was, I felt the need to stay and allow it. In the darkness, I wondered if Fritz had been born again, disgusted at how the modern world was, and was urging me to wait until the day he could lead a revolution.

That day never came. The last thing I remember is being hit with a pipe.

Roderich was the only person I ever had romantic feelings for. Elizabeta and I were rivals, through and through, but even in the worst of times, we worried for one another’s safety.

Canonmates--Antonio/Spain; Arthur [England]; Baldroy [Berwald/Sweden]; Ciel [Eirikur/Iceland]; Feliciano [North Italy]; Finnian [Tino/Finland]; Francis [France]; Ivan [Russia]; Lukas [Norway]; Mattias Denmark]; Merlin [Ludwig/Germany]; Roderich [Austria]; Romano [South Italy]